Blogging Red Flag

Yesterday I'm driving to Bobaloca and I'm very nervous about how I'm going to transport the Bobalocas back home because the Jaguar has this ridiculous little cup holder tray. It is very jiggly for one; I am not sure what kind of accident the cup holder was involved in previously in it's life, but it is very shaky and not reliable at all. It has the grip of an 80-year-old woman. Also, it is literally about a centimeter deep. So you can put anything you want in there but the first turn you make , its gonna come flying out.

So: jiggly, very short, in a car that I don't want to get messy, all add up to making me very nervous. I don't think Bobaloca has those cardboard drink holders, I usually just hold the drink between my legs, thank you very much. But I don't think I can fit 2 large Bobalocas between my legs. I'm just not that talented.

Then I remember that they have these supercool lids that basically just seal the entire top surface of the cup with a layer of plastic. To drink your tea you have to very symbolically plunge a sharpened straw into the plastic and pierce the seal, thereby gaining access to your tea. I always feel like I should apologize to it before I desecrate it like that, it's very yang. I just won't deflower my teas and I can plop them right on the floor, do donuts in the parking lot, take corners at 60 miles an hour (you know, the way I normally drive), and nothing bad will happen .

So I get them in the car and I put them on the floor and I TAKE A PICTURE of the teas with my phone. (Right about here is where my red flag should have been pinging) I'm very proud of myself.

Then I realize, in the front seat is okay, but in the back seat is even BETTER. So I wedge them in between the front and the back seat so they stay upright, even though it doesn't really matter, it just makes me feel better. I now proceed to take ANOTHER PICTURE of them in their new location in the back seat. (Red flag #2)



Yes, the front and back seats are that close in the Jag, with the seat all the way back. Hope you don't have anything vaguely resembling legs cause you won't be able to take them with you, sitting back there. Maybe can put them in the trunk. Unless they are thinner than a 16 oz drink, then you can keep them.

I'm having so much fun taking pictures and storyboarding in my mind, I whip out my phone again and start recording some notes so, you know, I don't forget any of the vitally important facts about this little escapade. Luckily my phone has a very short capture time and cuts me off right about the time I'm describing the shrink-wrapped lids ... (My phone tries to give me red flag #3 but I'm oblivious, high on the fumes of tea-induced blogging!)

Then it dawns on me: I'm planning on blogging about tea. Not only that, I'm inexplicably excited about this blog post about tea. I've taken TWO pictures now and I've sketched out a story line and I've taken NOTES and I'm going to tell people about bubble tea, the 3 people left in the world who don't know what bubble tea is.

If you are one of those 3 people, my apologies, I've run out of room to actually blog about bubble tea. I'm too busy telling the story of my ever-loosening grip on sanity. Go to Wiki for more info.

Here is where my red flag finally activates, taking longer to kick in than Hillary's capitulation to Obama. What has happened to me that I'm excited about blogging about tea? Storyboarding and photos and notes? About TEA?!! This kind of scares me because I don't even own any cats, not even one! I don't have a Phantom of the Opera poster up anywhere in my house, I don't have any harlequin clowns stashed anywhere.

Shouldn't I be alarmed? Isn't this one of the first signs of the apocalypse? Is this where I'm headed? Is this my future, blogging about tea? I'm terrified of what's next. If you see a post about Murder She Wrote, please do a blogging intervention on me.